I am where I need to be

I’ve been searching for what I could blog about for a few months now. I find myself navigating between ‘Finding my gratitude’ to ‘Where’s my adventurous spirit’. I think I’m flirting between the two at the moment and maybe that’s the grey area that’s needed.

I am sure I don’t need to list reasons why some of our spirit bubbles may be busted at the moment. At one point I was a person that completely ignored the news, but it doesn’t feel right at the current moment. There’s some area in that that knowing how lucky you have it can be measured by how others are so unlucky. I feel there’s a dark web to be found in there in some way, but at the moment, I’m still listening and learning from everyone around the world that is truly suffering from war, fear of Covid and those that are fighting the good fight to stop misinformation.

As I sat comfortably in a local restaurant having brunch, I was listening to the updates in Ukraine. I am devastated by the news today as it’s one of the worst days I’ve hard since the terror in that country. I sat comfortably at my table without a real care in the world. It seems surreal to feel so safe in so many ways but at the same time know that there is so many people suffering.

I ask myself often what can I do? How can you get through life knowing that people have it so much worse? As much as I don’t have the answer, I feel that is our responsibility to be educated on what’s going on around us, and not to lose sight of the man privileges that I have and where I live. I am lifted by those around me that continue to be aware of the same privilege, but that also enjoy life around them. Following friends’ adventures, planning my own for down the road, and seeing those that haven’t felt safe to be in the community in the past two years take a leap of faith and start getting back to what makes them happy.

There’s a space I feel that is a bit uncomfortable and that may not seem like the fondest place to be. It’s nestled in between work, the gym or for a ski and a hike. For the time being I don’t believe it’s a space that needs to be fixed or corrected. It’s about settling in and recognizing some discomfort, but also reminding myself how far I’ve come in the past two years.

Part of the venture is the unknown. For now, I’m okay to sit here a bit longer as I plan my next shift for the spring and summer. New places, memories and challenges which I am up for. I think this is about like taking on an epic ride or run. The highs and lows you feel during the training or race is part of the experience. You are ready for it; you’ve prepared and you have to keep peddling along and trust that you have the experience and knowledge to persevere.

Trust the process.

Trust yourself.